With hope in their hearts

By Dominica Are. Dominica, 32, is an accountant from Papua New Guinea who writes short stories and poetry. Please read her essay and leave your thoughts and comments below.

Parenting is one of the toughest jobs on the planet. As a parent, it is our primary responsibility to ensure that our children are happy, healthy and safe. No parent wants to see their child hurt. No parent wants to see their child suffering or going through a difficult time. As long as they are breathing, they will always stand by their children. Parents make decisions in the best interests of their children. Parents make sacrifices and sometimes? that is to put their children’s needs above their own. Parents sacrifice their own pleasure and comfort for their children. They would go the extra mile to do anything for their children’s happiness and safety.

But what do they do when circumstances are beyond their control?

We live in the moment. We live each day quite oblivious of what lies ahead. One minute we are living perfectly, happy and in peace and bam! Bang! Everything clatters! In this time of uncertainty when disaster and problems struck unexpectedly, when dreadful things happen to destroy our lives, when our peace and security is threatened, we have to get away. We have to flee for safety. We have to avoid danger, even if it means leaving our comfort zone. Leaving our abode that was once full of happiness, love and tranquillity no matter how painful it is. No one wants to get hurt. No one can even consider the possibility of remaining and continuing to suffer. No one wants to suffer at the brutal hands of disasters, poverty, illness, war and physical suffering. These forces can destroy the most robust of lives.

What will parents do in such hopeless situations? The kind of situation that is uglier than death itself? The kind of situation that’s completely beyond them?

In such appalling situation, their duty still comes into play. They won’t give up easily without putting up a fight, without trying out every option available to get away from danger. They will always be there for their children in good, bad and dangerous times. They are their children’s guiding hands. They will still be vigilant. However, imagine the internal debate and commotion on a parent’s mind as they try to make a decision in this precise moment. Struggling with themself, fighting to decide the best option even if it won’t make sense at the moment as the future is unforeseen.

There are situations that won’t give them ample time to rationalize things meticulously, when they have to make a spur of the moment decision. Decisions that many may not understand, even their own children. Resistance may not be an option at this time given the graveness of the situation. Children cannot argue. Children have to obey with faith in their parent’s decisions, like in other circumstances that their parents have done what’s best for them. It’s eminent, parents would give everything for their children to be well and alive.

Envisage their poor broken minds and hearts as they make this drastic but heart wrenching decision but with hope in their hearts that beyond here, their children will be safe. Beyond here, there is sunshine at least for the moment. Like in all other resolutions that they have made, in their hearts and minds, they hope that this is the greatest so far. They are humans, they are frightened, sad and worried but they are very good in hiding their emotions, for the sake of their children. They are truly great role models and exceptional beings.

One cannot make a quick judgement such as ruthless abandonment, child endangerment and neglect. One must understand the blatant reality of the situation and the awful decisions that parents must make. How can they just stand feebly and watch their children being swallowed up by these destructive forces when there is a glimmer of hope in making this decision?

Yes, it’s a challenging decision, but if it’s their only chance of survival then so be it. Yes, they may shudder at the thought of doing this, but if this is their only way out of this hopeless situation, they might as well take the risk. Maybe, that decision was their only hope when danger is looming right behind their back. To evade danger, to stay alive, they must take the plunge.

Their priority after all is to keep their children away from harm’s way, full stop.

3 comments on “With hope in their hearts

  1. Leentje Be'Soer on

    Dear Neeka, I have never realized the role of my parents especially my mother until I became a mom. Your essay highlights the many points young teenagers fail to recognize as they try to flex their wings and make decisions by refusing advises from parents.
    PS: Iam.humbled and so proud of you. I am glad our paths crossed in this lifetime.


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