How Conflict Affects Life Stories

By Caryl Sapepe. Caryl, 21, is a freelance writer. She lives in Bayawan City, Philippines. Please read her article and leave your thoughts and comments below.

We structure our lives into stories to cherish experiences. This makes us the main character of our own stories. Through storytelling, we make sense of life. In this dynamic world where everyone has to undergo personal growth and development, conflict is an inevitable part of life. It makes us feel anxious and uncertain when our defense mechanisms activate, while it creates opportunities for self-improvement.

When Veronica Ruth talks about a utopian world where everything is perfect, she argues that “If there’s no conflict, there are no stories worth telling – or reading.” She would not write a story with a poor main character having no obstacles and setbacks to overcome. Authors like her prefer a dystopian world where the characters live in a miserable society that needs to be changed. Depending on a person’s point of view, a utopian fiction could be just like dystopian fiction. For instance, a world where everyone is rich and powerful is utopia to the poor; to the rest of us who consider the balancing concept in economics, it is not. If she were to write or read a utopian fiction, she would prefer a plot in which the characters are free-spirited and focused on their aspirations in life. In other words, she believes that a story would be boring without conflict.

We use stories to make sense of life. Perhaps, everyone wants to live a life filled with meaning, happiness, and fulfillment; however, not all stories reflect realities. Everybody is the main character of their own stories in real life. In fact, we consider ourselves as important characters in the culmination of God’s plan for mankind, the controversial human evolution, and all human history. This leads to self-realization in which we give meaning to our experiences.

Conflict creates opportunities to improve ourselves. If we become more flexible and open, then we will have a better reputation for being reasonable in dealing things. Perhaps, the greatest conflict of our ancestors is about how they could immortalize their existence— their culture, tradition, technology, and way of education and governance. Conflict had helped them generate solutions, gain trust, and establish strong relationships. Now, historians acknowledge the existence of ancient civilizations. When we are in conflict, we usually adjust to others and try to separate right from wrong. Being aware of other’s perception, we realize our own identity.

When we tell others about ourselves, we usually do it in a narrative way. This is how we communicate. Conflict influences the way we express ourselves. The common reason why we do not get what we want is because we fail to express what we want; however, we should observe a sense of balance in which we take a stance on a particular issue without being a complete pushover. In this era of fast communication and information, we are encouraged to be aware of the pressing issues in the society.

Conflict guides us in setting limits and making necessary agreements. For instance, giving up can be a sign of strength sometimes— the best option when we feel like we cannot win a particular conflict. Most of us do not know where to start or when to stop, so encountering conflicts can make us think of innovative solutions to solve them.

As long as we are alive, we inevitably encounter conflicts where the most innovative solutions come out of it. Though it makes us feel uncomfortable when we are exposed to it in real life situations, it creates opportunities for us to be better versions of ourselves. Likewise, it has literary importance to character development that advances the storyline and keeps the readers’ interest.

50 comments on “How Conflict Affects Life Stories

  1. Maso on

    Conflict is indeed always there, like light and darkness.There’s no light if there’s no darkness.Its existence make this world interesting.Although a lot may think it’s a negative vibe.Kudos author.

    Reply
  2. Kenneth Carlorio Surilla on

    This is very reflective. I also believe that conflict along with change are just two of the few permanent ideas in the universe. Because, it is in the nature of human to be unsatisfied and always wanting. Therefore, there is the basic conflict. Especially with so many lives intertwined, the conflicts solved or unsolved will always lead to another conflict.

    We can only do the best we can together to solve conflicts and sew a tapestry of books wherein stories can be read better… or with a cup of coffee.

    Reply
  3. Coco Yen on

    Yes, life stories are basis of literary genre. Thriller, comedy, romance, drama, mystery, science fiction, fantasy- you name it! And every story plot conflict has its own elements. ☺

    Reply
  4. Larry on

    This article is more compelling than I expected. It simplifies how powerful conflict is, in terms of establishing a dynamic storyline of a person’s life. As a common denotation, conflict germinates anger and sprout weeds of violence. Ergo, we must also ingest that conflict exists as part of a normal social life, which feeds our emotional needs.

    Reply
  5. Narlyn on

    “Conflict creates opportunities to improve ourselves.” Yes, I agree, perhaps your analytical skill will be measured in order to solve the it.

    Reply
  6. Mahesh Singh Negi on

    Lovely article God bless such type of lovely thoughts in future also God bless you forever be happy always…. 😊😊😊

    Reply
    • Amparo on

      For me conflict is my life style,, dealings with people in our soroundings invironment. Of course it will affects your life, but it couldn’t change my distiny. Wisdom from God’s words it’s to navigate my 🔮 future. Shalom 😍

      Reply
  7. Joswa on

    “Conflict influences the way we express ourselves. The common reason why we do not get what we want is because we fail to express what we want; however, we should observe a sense of balance in which we take a stance on a particular issue without being a complete pushover.”

    This really hit me

    Reply
  8. Roro on

    Thank you for sharing your ideas. Conflicts, though challenging and difficult as they seem, bring out the resiliency in us and the drive to learn and live from it. It’s like passing through a furnace (heated many times) and coming out as pure gold.

    Reply
  9. Reychemver on

    Conflict is an inevitable reality for humans, even to other living creatures. It makes all go beyond deeper conversations that would eventually twist and change every unique story. The challenge is that the positive and negative ways it brings depend on how are we gonna overcome it and write the best ending. Bottomline: life has taught us that it is best to take the risks.

    Reply
  10. Emma on

    This is superb! I love the way the author welcomes and embraces conflict for one’s growth, the meaningful manifestation of a person’s existence.

    “Conflict creates opportunities to improve ourselves. If we become more flexible and open, then we will have a better reputation for being reasonable in dealing things.”

    And we will have good stories to tell, most importantly, the next generations!!!

    Reply
  11. Joanne on

    This is so true. Conflict even creates a thought process because both parties can know and express their side of the story. It is actually essential to one’s life bc you can even learn from it. Nice article!

    Reply
  12. Wayne N. Banaybanay on

    As a storyteller at a daily basis myself, I find this article very relevant and relatable. It is indeed the conflict that makes our stories resound to those who pay attention. Even simple life experiences can be great stories if angled with authenticity paired with some artistic touch. The more these stories solicit impact towards the listeners/readers through awe, inspiration, and emotions, the more it is compelling for them to learn,
    realize or act.

    Great write-up, Caryl! Keep up the good work.

    Reply
  13. JL Alviola on

    I love how this article is written, very well-structured, but most importantly I like how it tackles why conflict is very important in every story.

    Reply
  14. Hengie Jalando-on on

    Great mind! I found your text conversational and dynamic. Your standpoint is channeled in a healthy composition. It is unnecessary to awe readers with something unknown but to let them realize how the obvious reality is neglected in the world. Conflicts are happening everyday, but still, not everyone can think rationally.

    Reply
  15. Carla Mae Caspe on

    “As long as we are alive, we inevitably encounter conflicts where the most innovative solutions come out of it. ” Indeed, we can all live harmoniously despite conflicts as long as we know how to handle them.

    Reply
  16. Kleine Jun Ontolan on

    Conflict is what keeps the balance between sanity and dissociation. It’s essential for the circle of life. The article follows the ebb and flow of how conflict meddles trough the diversity of life. Reflective yet provocative. This one’s moving.

    Reply
  17. Lifeel on

    I have encountered conflicts along the way but I feared what I am most experiencing now, maybe because of the career path I chose. Upon reading the article, I was able to realize that too much concern of the conflicts I am experiencing would tantamount to a loss of identity. I’d rather cherish it for it helps me build my own character, and eventually help me grow.

    Reply
  18. olanrewaju on

    I humbly agree because without conflict at time truth will not be reveil, Very well said. Keep it up dear, the LORD will increase you in all ramification.

    Reply

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